YOUR MONEY SCRIPTS

The mass perception of fewer options (no pun intended) is seizing people, rendering them practically paralyzed. I see it happening with people in my own life. Are there ways to loosen this self-imposed stranglehold?

I've witnessed how this climate tends to magnify people's self-talk. Money scripts are running off the page so fast, you can't keep up. If it was fear around money, it's more fear now. If it was fog, more fog. If it was deprivation, more deprivation and scarcity.

What are your scripts?

We can't control anything but ourselves. As readers of this Newsletter by now you know that money issues are not about money. The root causes are the result of the underlying beliefs you carry - subconsciously, for many.

I believe that particularly in trying times like this, it is all the more important to have complete awareness around your money relationship. Please take a few moments to write down your responses to the following:

Write down the first 8 to 10 words that come to mind when you think of the word "Money."

• Underline all of the words you have identified which you think have anegative connotation.
• Write down three things that you are proud of in terms of your relationship to money.
• Write down three things that you feel badly about in terms of your relationship to money.
• Identify which list was easiest for you to complete.
• Write down your most joyful experience with money.
• Write down your most painful experience with money.
• Identify which memory was easiest for you to recall.

Take a twenty dollar bill and look at it. Write down the answer to the following question: What has this ever done to hurt you?

Save a possible paper cut, the obvious answer is that the piece of paper you were holding has never done anything to hurt you. Rather, the hurt you may have identified related to money resulted from your experiences with people and situations, not the actual money itself.

Let me know which of your money scripts are running. You can always reach me at Helen@YourMoneyRelationship.com. I might like to address an aspect of it in future newsletters and I am 99.9% sure that people will be able to relate (Don't worry; your name will never be revealed : ).

The Rescue Fantasy

Let's turn off CNN (Constantly Negative News), take a deep breath and take stock. All this talk about the Bailout has me thinking about a self-sabotaging symptom I see too often, particularly in those who suffer from Underearning, Debting or being in a Money Fog; that would be the "Rescue Fantasy".

What is the Rescue Fantasy?

Tucked in the back of millions of minds is the idea or fantasy that if things start spiraling out of control, someone, something or some organization will be there to, well... bail you out. The result, if you suffer from this delusion (probably subconsciously), is that you undermine your ability to earn your full potential and create a full life by not taking conscious charge of your finances. Should things not go the way you hope, somehow you'll have a fall back. It's all kind of vague and hazy...

Also, if you are foggy about money you are probably very good at finding people (who usually have the best of intentions), companies (ex.credit card companies) or organizations that enable you to carry on with certain behaviors around money that in the end are not serving your best interests. You are beholden to everyone else but yourself.

Some examples of enablers might be:

A husband or wife

A parent or sibling

A relative

A boss

A friendCredit card companies

Any other organizations or companies that allowed you to extend your payments

You can't afford not to get clear and conscious with your money as in the end, it is your life that you are living, not anyone else's and not for anyone else. All the more reason why it is necessary for you to take stock of your own financial situation and examine the results you are getting.

The benefits of true self-care FAR outweigh the benefits of being tied, monetarily or emotionally to someone, something or a seemingly harmless Fantasy. The Rescue Fantasy is a dangerous hook to get caught on as it will only hold you back by letting you think that things will somehow sort themselves out and by creating a false sense of security.

Life is not without its problems but personally feel I would rather blunder through with clarity and purpose, than let other people and circumstances run me.

So the question isn't "Can anyone count on you?" but "Can you count on yourself?" Warm wishes,

P.S. I love watching my clients make huge strides in their relationship to money and watching them craft their lives around their priorities, interests and talents. I feel truly privileged to be a part of their process. If you are ready to do the same for yourself, learn more about the Fresh Financial Program, our bi-weekly telegroup where we look at your money relationship from the emotional and practical aspects.